Today is the first day in the past month or so that I feel like I actually have something to say. Writing isn't always easy for me and I have spent the past two months feeling sorry for myself and letting myself go back where I never thought I would be again. But today I have something to say, the inner skinny kid wants to fight back so I am letting him have his say. Its time to stop calling it my inner fat kid, I have an outer fat kid and an inner skinny kid. I am overweight, out of shape, and just plain tired. The skinny kid is fighting to get out and I keep beating him back down (its's really not hard to do, he is easily pursuaded by pizza)
So here is an update as to what I have been up to....
1. started a new job, its a great job and I love what I am doing. My stress level is way down, I am home at night, and I get to spend a lot more time with my family. However I not as active as I was before, I spend most of my day in a office chair except for the 30 min or so I go out and walk during lunch. Office life is different, I used to be around people that were in fairly decent shape. There were definitely a lot of people on the ambulance who weren't in shape unless you count round as a shape but they could lift a gurney or a patient when it came down to it. I always looked at the patients and thought how much I did not want to be like them but there is a disconnect when you are the EMT and they are the patient. You don't put yourself in the same category as them, you are better then them, you are healthier, you are younger, etc etc. But now that I work in the office I am one of them, there is no separation of healthy and sick or young and old. We are just all office staff. More than half of the office has type 2 diabetes, there are a couple with pancreatitis, and more than a few who are setting up for a major cardiac event. I am right there with them, not as far along the track but I am getting there. You would think that this would have made me want to eat lettuce and water but I have had a free for all lately.
2. I have gained back some of the weight I lost not a lot, mostly muscle tone. I am trying to get back into going to the gym after work. Now that I have more time I don't have any excuse not to go.
3. I have been trying to work on my coping skills for stress, and anger. I realized that I have been channeling a lot of those things into what I am eating. Bad day at work? eat a donut. Mad because you gained weight? Have a beer! Saying NO! is the hardest part. I can make the right food, and study work out guides until my eyes cross but it doesn't do any good If I don't put the work in.
So now its time to put in some work, some really hard, fist pumping, oatmeal eating, weight lifting work. I am not sure where the fist pumping comes into place but it just felt right. ANNNND in the spirit of complete honesty....here is my horrible diet diary, not so bad workout diary, and my steps according to my pedometer
Breakfast- bfast sandwhich(crossiant, cheese, ham, egg) fruit bowl
lunch- ft long turkey sandwhich on wheat, no cheese, lettuce, tomato, mayo mustard onion oil vinegar salt pepper
snack- crunch bar
predinner snack- hummus with whole wheat pita
Dinner - whole wheat spaghetti with heart smart sauce and chicken sausage
workout- squats with 40lb rack, push ups, seated row, step ups, physioball curls, 10 min walk 4.0 speed, 5% incline
Pedometer: 10,674 steps (anything over 10k is good)
So here is an update as to what I have been up to....
1. started a new job, its a great job and I love what I am doing. My stress level is way down, I am home at night, and I get to spend a lot more time with my family. However I not as active as I was before, I spend most of my day in a office chair except for the 30 min or so I go out and walk during lunch. Office life is different, I used to be around people that were in fairly decent shape. There were definitely a lot of people on the ambulance who weren't in shape unless you count round as a shape but they could lift a gurney or a patient when it came down to it. I always looked at the patients and thought how much I did not want to be like them but there is a disconnect when you are the EMT and they are the patient. You don't put yourself in the same category as them, you are better then them, you are healthier, you are younger, etc etc. But now that I work in the office I am one of them, there is no separation of healthy and sick or young and old. We are just all office staff. More than half of the office has type 2 diabetes, there are a couple with pancreatitis, and more than a few who are setting up for a major cardiac event. I am right there with them, not as far along the track but I am getting there. You would think that this would have made me want to eat lettuce and water but I have had a free for all lately.
2. I have gained back some of the weight I lost not a lot, mostly muscle tone. I am trying to get back into going to the gym after work. Now that I have more time I don't have any excuse not to go.
3. I have been trying to work on my coping skills for stress, and anger. I realized that I have been channeling a lot of those things into what I am eating. Bad day at work? eat a donut. Mad because you gained weight? Have a beer! Saying NO! is the hardest part. I can make the right food, and study work out guides until my eyes cross but it doesn't do any good If I don't put the work in.
So now its time to put in some work, some really hard, fist pumping, oatmeal eating, weight lifting work. I am not sure where the fist pumping comes into place but it just felt right. ANNNND in the spirit of complete honesty....here is my horrible diet diary, not so bad workout diary, and my steps according to my pedometer
Breakfast- bfast sandwhich(crossiant, cheese, ham, egg) fruit bowl
lunch- ft long turkey sandwhich on wheat, no cheese, lettuce, tomato, mayo mustard onion oil vinegar salt pepper
snack- crunch bar
predinner snack- hummus with whole wheat pita
Dinner - whole wheat spaghetti with heart smart sauce and chicken sausage
workout- squats with 40lb rack, push ups, seated row, step ups, physioball curls, 10 min walk 4.0 speed, 5% incline
Pedometer: 10,674 steps (anything over 10k is good)
