Its hard to explain to somebody who has never been fat what your inner fat kid is, why you can't say no to one more slice of pizza or why spending 3hours in the gym isn't a "fun" activity for you. I think of him like a Thurman merman type kid wearing a backpack leash that I have to drag around everywhere, somedays he is small and easy to carry other times he is a 300lb linebacker pulling ME. The fat kid has a unique ability to grab my by my belly fat and pull me towards a open pizza buffet. (This may disturb some of you, and for those with a weak stomach I recommend moving to the next paragraph) Its like I have a belly button ring that is attached to a string and this string is attached to my inner fat kid who will only pull me to bad food and my couch.The fat kid pulls me until I reach one of the two and it hurts until I get to where the string wants me to go but once I get there its a great feeling. I enjoy the bad food, how can you not love cheese, sauce, pepperoni, sausage, and dough??? I have no need to run 26.2 miles, do an iron man, or eat tofu. I know its good for me and I know people think that it makes you a better person. I do want to be a better person, I want to be a healthier person, and more than anything I want as much time as possible with my family and friends.
So unfortunately its Day 1...again. Time to get back on the wagon. The wagon is filled with other foodaholics so that is nice. I have noticed that when foodaholics get together all we talk about is the food we miss. This cracks me up, and I am as guilty of it as the next fatty. The trainer that kicked my butt on a regular basis before the wedding has her own fat kid. We went out to lunch the other day to a great restaurant that has healthy options and is delicious (even her firefighter fiancee likes it), we both ordered giant salads with yummy toppings and after we finished catching up and gossiping it started to become a conversations about all the bad food we missed and how bad we used to be (aka eating a whole pizza or dipping oreos in PB). Once I am on the "wagon" It seems like I put food on a pedestal. Things that wouldn't normally bother me such as ice cream, start an immediate drool train. The things that normally I like but I now eat on a regular basis get old quick. I need to figure out a way to change things up. Lunch and breakfast are the hardest because of time. I think I might have to tap into my inner hippie and start going to farmers markets for cheap fruit and veggies. I love fresh fruit and veggies but because of the cost and ease of frozen or prepackaged food, I tend to take the easy route.
So if you see me feel free to give me a swift kick in the ass. I will not go back down this route of self hatred and doughnuts. But its day 1, time to focus on my 30 day fatty chip. So Eat Clean, Enjoy Life, and Laugh at the people who run for fun (they are dumb).
So unfortunately its Day 1...again. Time to get back on the wagon. The wagon is filled with other foodaholics so that is nice. I have noticed that when foodaholics get together all we talk about is the food we miss. This cracks me up, and I am as guilty of it as the next fatty. The trainer that kicked my butt on a regular basis before the wedding has her own fat kid. We went out to lunch the other day to a great restaurant that has healthy options and is delicious (even her firefighter fiancee likes it), we both ordered giant salads with yummy toppings and after we finished catching up and gossiping it started to become a conversations about all the bad food we missed and how bad we used to be (aka eating a whole pizza or dipping oreos in PB). Once I am on the "wagon" It seems like I put food on a pedestal. Things that wouldn't normally bother me such as ice cream, start an immediate drool train. The things that normally I like but I now eat on a regular basis get old quick. I need to figure out a way to change things up. Lunch and breakfast are the hardest because of time. I think I might have to tap into my inner hippie and start going to farmers markets for cheap fruit and veggies. I love fresh fruit and veggies but because of the cost and ease of frozen or prepackaged food, I tend to take the easy route.
So if you see me feel free to give me a swift kick in the ass. I will not go back down this route of self hatred and doughnuts. But its day 1, time to focus on my 30 day fatty chip. So Eat Clean, Enjoy Life, and Laugh at the people who run for fun (they are dumb).
1 comment:
You go girl! One day at a time:)
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