Olympic Glory: Going for Brown

You probably are thinking this post is going to be about poop based on the title. 

Well I can't promise there won't be any poop jokes but it won't be the only topic

Sunday was my first Olympic Distance Triathlon

I have completed 4 Sprint distances so I thought 

" well hell, lets double the distance and see how that goes"

It was a warm up for the 70.3 Half Ironman in October 

1500 meter swim, 26 mile bike ride, 6.2 mile run 

no big deal

I have been training for a half Ironman

I got this

26 miles on a bike is nothing

 I have ridden the course, I know whats coming. 

Well all of that was well and good until I was racking Sprout (my bike) and ahem... Lubing my chassis. 

There are moments in life that make you second guess your decisions,

lubing up in front of a couple hundred people is one of them. 

Talking about lube on your blog even though you know your parents read this is another one. 

oh well

sorry mom and dad

So,..

I racked sprout, lubed up, stripped down to my race suit and tri shorts in front of god and everyone. Then because I didn't look cool enough and I still had a shred of dignity left I put on my cap and goggles. 

So now I am bug eyed, spandexed, lubed, sunblocked and ready to race

Lets get this done! I have beer to drink!!

Oh look they are going

there are a lot of green caps in that group

hmm. No that can't be right I am supposed to be with the green caps

ShitShitShitShitShitShit

WAAIIIITTT

*starts garmin*

Okay and GOOOOOOOOOO

Water is my element.

My spirit animal is a manatee

A fast manatee but still a sea cow

Off I went, I tried to focus on not getting clobbered or doing any clobbering of my own

Open water swims are a fight

very nice people start throwing punches, pulling feet, and swimming like drunk seals into you 

I try to stay to the side so that I keep any UFC style fights to a minimum

I did have one chick run into my side repeatedly

I have no idea what she was doing or where she was going

maybe she thought I was a kayak

I made it out of the water around 31 minutes

It felt like longer than 1500 meters so I have a feeling I went a little too wide trying to avoid the pack of rabid humans. 

Next was onto the bike

I have practiced this course before so I felt confident

The course decided to knock me down a few pegs

everyone I had passed in the water was now flying past me on the bike 

I huffed my way up the hills

screamed all the way down the hills

35 mph on a bike is not fun 

anyone who says otherwise has a death wish

I wasn't sure what I was more afraid of... crashing at 35mph, popping a tire at 35mph, or shitting myself at 35mph (there it is! poop joke: complete)

I just screamed obscenities the most of the way back 

I must have been entertaining because I heard more than one spectator chuckle

once Sprout and I made it back to transition (we made it in one piece) I ripped off my cleats, put on another layer of sunblock, another layer of lube and got to work. 

The run course is no joke. 

1 mile flat, 2 miles up  hill (and not a cute "hill"), 2 miles down hill, 1 mile back to the finish line

I decided to walk the 2 miles up hill. 

I wasn't going to be breaking any records running it and I decided it was better to save my legs and make up the time coming back downhill. 

I averaged 15-16min miles going up and 10 min miles coming back down 

by the time I hit the one mile left mark I was tired

Tired and hot and hungry and tired and thirsty and hot and whiny

and ready to be done

I ran/walked until I could see the turn to the finish

at that point some members from our local running club started running with me

I said I wanted to walk

and they said no (I appreciated it)

so I ran

I did not run fast

coming into the finish line I picked it up a little more and gave it everything I had

I left everything out on that course and I would do it all over again

having family to cheer me in was the best

(in law family, running family, friends for life family, badass family)

even the announcer noticed how big our cheering section was .

I needed shade, food, and cold water in no particular order

I forgot how much the sun affects you at 7000ft

after a few minutes in the shade, 73 water bottles, 3 watermelons and 12 oranges I started to feel normal 

I could have gone for an ice bath that was equal parts ice and beer but that just wasn't in the cards

I came in 74th place which I have decided is the honorable brown medal

Next in was Jolynn and then Heather

I love watching people come in

the smiles, the fist pumps, the tears

I just love finish lines

After the race it was cold beer and an atrocious amount of calories

It was the best beer I have ever had

and it was Bud Light

All and all this gave me a good idea of where I am in training, what I need to work on 

(hills.. cough cough...) and how important training is. I could have never completed this race if I hadn't been kicking my ass for the last 7 weeks. 

It will only get harder from here but the finish line high will keep me going for a while

Next up Tempe Tri

Then its the Big One

Better find some brown tri shorts 

(You didn't think I would leave with just 1 poop joke did you?)